50 is

I just turned 50.

50 is collecting art. 50 is taking accountability for your health.  What I mean is the friendships you fall into when you’re young by the time you’re 50 have become a commitment, a commitment to people you love. 

50 is a discovery of who I am now, which is changing more than ever.  50 is a continued practice of self expression.  At 50 you can see patterns that at 20 seems like a one-off. :- ) 50 you know who you are, and you know who your friends are.  At 50 I am blessed to have both my parents.  At 50 I’m not ready for anything different than that.  At 50 I can dress for comfort and surround myself with and wear the colors I love. At 50 I have more money than when I was 20.

At 50 “the world is your oyster” feels different. I want different things from the world. I can see, I can acknowledge all the angels and support that have helped me in life. I am grateful. I still have things I want to do. I realize I am not really doing them alone. I can look back on the places I’ve been and people I’ve known with pride. I still love people.  I still love dance.  Life at 50 is like clarified better. It’s what it always was, and yet the best parts remain, and there’s more transparency, more clarity.  There’s still tea. There’s still work.

Somehow, there are more things surrounding me to lift me up. It feels more solid at 50. Feels like you’re less scrappy.  Some things have been established.   Things have taken root. I am more familiar with what I love.  And I can bring more of it into my life.  I love the ocean. I love best friends. I love good words.  I love slow mornings. I love the birds. I love to laugh. I love to travel.  I love flowers. I love Stewart and Rosie.  I love their bulldogs. I love that time can feel spacious.  I love that you seem to be given the resources and tools to make the life that works for you.